Kiss My Ass!

"I like big BUTTS and I cannot lie!"

     If you jump up when you hear this song, and not because it's a hilarious song, but because you have a big butt and you love it, this bud's for you!

     Well...us. I am so sick and tired of the booty hating going on in our society, especially between women (there are men booty haters but I'll deal with that at a later date). I mean, with the invention and uprising of butt pads, why are women still looking down and hating on The Booty Brigade?

True, men tend to follow us like sick puppies when they see the wagons dragging but geez louise this has gotten out of control! You can't go shopping, to the mall, work or even on effing Facebook without somebody saying something about the booty! There's nothing we can do about it outside of surgical correction and use that term lightly because reducing a booty causes a problem when there wasn't one to begin with.

In my case specifically, I know there will be those who say "It's not that your booty is big, but you don't have to show it like that" or whatever the latest phrase is but to them I say this: If I took pictures in too big sweatpants you and your man would still be able to see the Easter hams in my pants. Get over it! To those that say "You're disrespecting yourself" I say this: "Love me, hate me, say what you want about me, but all of the boys and all of the girls are begging to IF YOU SEEK AMY!" Yes, I took this from the mouth of a one Ms. Britney Spears but that's why ifuxwithBritney! She's basically saying "LET ME BE GREAT!" and I feel her!

I don't necessarily think you should let Amy meet any and everybody but if people seek another person's Amy, why get mad? Why not just find the Amy in YOU? You may have some Amy in your swag, but if you're hating on MY Amy how is anybody gonna ever even see, let alone seek YOUR Amy?

If you're a No Butt Nancy, being friends with Big Booty Judy may be intimidating and that's probably why members of The Booty Brigade typically are friends with only each other. And not that I'm begging No Butt Nancy's for friendship, I am asking for a decrease in the hateration. Big Booty Judy's make great friends and actually have brains, hearts, feelings and all that other stuff that makes you human. Everybody has one thing about them that sticks out so if everybody learns to love and promote that one thing then maybe we'll actually see a decrease in booty discrimination but until then:

Thanks Nike.